November12009
October182009
October152009
Secret #17
I used to wait for you. Days would go by before I got a text or a hello, but I was so elated to finally hear from you that I ignored all the signs.
I forgot that I deserve better. I forgot that I actually need someone who’s going to uplift and adore me, worship me, love me completely, just as I loved you. But I’ll never get that from you.
I’ll never get the sweet note or that hug or the awkward hand holding. I’ll never be able to hold you, to kiss you and run my fingers along your collar bone; you’re simply too cruel. I can’t deal with the insensitivity and the cutting jokes. I can’t deal with the degrading behavior you’re so trapped in.
You’re sorry? Well that’s wonderful, but I don’t want apologies. I want a change in behavior, a change in character, and I’m not going to ask that of you because I know you too well. This is who you are, this is how you are, and I’m not supposed to try and change that. I’m accepting you as You, and moving on.
I’m falling out of love…and it feels great.
October82009
Secret #16
I’ve recently decided to give up - and am surprised at how little I care…perhaps it’s possible, after all?
October42009
Secret #15
I would deal with you hurting me again and again,
as long as it meant
I could call you
mine.
